A Renewed Old Age

Perhaps some of you have seen the love story of two elderly people and how they met and committed to an exclusive relationship in this past Sunday's New York Times.  Here's the link in case you missed it.  The point is: You're never too old for romantic love. 

Enjoy!

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/08/11/fashion/weddings/embracing-technology-and-each-other.html?ref=style

Dr. Ruth has done it again!

http://www.thespec.com/living-story/3858564-aging-sex-and-myths-of-love/

What an amazing woman!

You're Never Too Old for Love!

http://womenconnectonline.com/category/lifestyle/ Here's a fun article I wrote for a neat site: womenconnectonline.com

HAPPY HEART MONTH!!!

The Mayor

The attached video and article are great.  The writer really captures the truth about what goes on in a retirement community when older adults talk about love and aging.

Good for older adults and their offspring!

Enjoy!


http://www.pegasusnews.com/news/2012/sep/28/the-mayor-dallas-videofest-dallas-senior-citizens/

When does middle age (and old age) begin?

http://www.medicaldaily.com/section/news/us-world.htm

Hi Folks,

Please check out the "Middle Age May Actually Begin at 55" entry on the link.  I tend to agree with the folks researching the 1,000 participants in the UK who've concluded that middle age begins later than we had assumed, and ends at age 69 and 277 days.  What that means, of course, is that we have to ratchet up the bar for those of us post-middle age; something I've been saying for a while. 

In any event, the same predictors hold true for both middle and (dare I say it?) old age.  Which is ... that both middle and old age is a state of mind, rather than something that begins at a certain age.

What do you say?

Regina

Great 'toons from AARP

Check out this link from AARP.  I got a big kick out of the cartoons.  Hope you do too.

http://bcove.me/ld86hjjp

Is There a Difference Between Love When You're Younger and Love When You're Older?

I asked several single older adults who were in committed relationships with a significant other if there was a difference between their experience now as compared to when they were younger.

As you would expect, they all answered "yes."  I asked them to explain further, and this is what they replied in their own words.

"I appreciate having somebody to be close with, somebody who cares about me and gives me lots of attention and affection.  Because I am older, I feel young again!" 

This 77-year-old woman continued, "When you're younger, love is more exciting and intense.  When you're older, love is calmer and in a way a more different beauty; a lovely relief from the intensity of younger love."

                                                           .....................

 An 82-year-old woman says,

             "If you are not living together with your significant other what works so well is that you have independence yet you have this close companionship.  You're not infringing on their personal habits.  At this stage, your children are grown and you have no responsibilities for them.  Hopefully, you're not dependent on someone else for your subsistence.  Even if your health is so-so, you can still be together and compromise on what you can do.  It's a freer sort of thing.  When you're younger, there are too many things that influence.  Parents, building a future.  But at this age you're more open than when you're younger; you're less materialistic, which affects the way you look at love.

            "At this age," she sums up, "I'll take whatever joy comes my way.  Having someone close to you is terrific."

                                                                   ........................
 An 85-year-old man who is blessed with good health sums it up with "contentedness vs. excitement."  He explains, "When you're younger the hormones that keep the race going are more prominent.  In fact, you're dominated by them, but as you get older, your biology changes and life is not as intense ... you're not pushing all the time, which reflects itself in personal relationships.

 "With men especially, he continues, "you need to prove yourself earlier in life and the need to do that when you're older isn't paramount.  Therefore, you've become a less intense person.  I don't want to rush now," he says.  I want serenity."

                                                                   .........................

"We don't have time to spare," says an 81-year-old woman, "and so we act on our impulses.  When you're young, you're so busy being young that you just don't get it.  You're too concerned with life and it goes by so fast.  When you're older, you realize the true pleasure of connection and you're really in touch with your feelings.

"To love and be loved is truly what is most important in life ... family, friends, and your soul mate -- if you're lucky -- to share the beauty of love."

                                                                   -0-


Well, folks, what do you think?  Can we talk?  I'd love to hear your comments.  Please fill out the comment box or email me at 2rdreyer@gmail.com. 

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING!

Finally - A Website!!

Hello All,

        As stated on my website, a problem that many 70+ single men and women have, is "Where do I find a significant other/caring companion/special friend?"

       Surveyed participants claim they met in these places: 

• A singles discussion group connected with a branch of the church to which they both belonged;
• Through their retirement community;
• Through volunteer work where they were both volunteers;
• Through a non-profit agency where one was an employee and the other was a volunteer;
• Through mutual friends in a social setting (wedding, bar mitzvah);
• Through a personal ad in a community newspaper;
• Through an activity at the public library.

      I'm looking for 70+ people who met through Internet, but so far I haven't had any luck, even though I went online to seek them out.  If you or anyone you know has been able to find a special friend, could you let us know?  It would be helpful for those who are fearful of online communication.  (Only screen names, please.) Or maybe you've met someone special and would like to tell us where. Hopefully, the list will grow long!

       The bottom line to finding a caring companion?  Keep your heart and your mind open to new experiences as you wend your way in the autumn of your life.  If you'd like my tip sheet for keeping your heart and mind open, just let me know by filling out the comments section.

       That's it for now.

       All the best,

       Regina

I'm now in with the Big People

Hi All,

After much back-and-forth correspondence, I'm finally in the Barnes & Noble bookstores as well as on their website both as a print book and an eBook, the latter at $.99.  My book, Love & Successful Aging when You're 70+ and Single, is also on Amazon.com and Kindle,  And, depending on your eReader,  should be available at the low, low price of $.99.

Why did I price the eBook so low?  Easily answered.  I got caught up in the WSJ article about a lawyer who took a shot at writing an adventure story and selling it at that price.  She made $130,000  and is looking for a publisher to come up with a print edition!  Most self-publishers invest in a print edition and hope THAT sells!  My experience with eBooks so far?  Made squat.

Okay, enough complaining.  Am checking out other avenues to pursue sales. 

By the way, I'm selling back some of my books to Amazon.com who then sells them to other vendors.  It's a neat way to de-clutter your bookcase and get a credit at Amazon to buy still more books!  And the neat thing is they pay the UPS charges!  Why not check it out? Now to find the right-size box ...

Thanks for listening.  Hope to hear from you soon.

All the best,

Regina

Getting Going on Presentations

Hi Folks,

Now that I've gotten a few successful presesentations under my belt, I can move forward with getting more. If you're interested in having me come to one of your events, please let me know and I'll give you all the particulars re cost and availability. If it's easier for you, contact me via email at 2rdreyer@gmail.com.

Here's a wonderful comment from one of the directors at a continuing care retirement community at which I recently spoke: "What I enjoyed the most about your presentation is that you openly hit issues head on about intimacy, sex, and relationships beyond 70 years of age. Often times it is considered taboo to be discussed; a subject that is never broached. Seniors are humans with the same emotional and physical needs that the rest of us have."  ... Kristin D.F.

It was very kind of her to say those meaningful words.

Here're a couple of pictures a friend of mine took during a library reading.  Hope you like them!

Why I Wrote This Book

Hi Friends,

        First, let me tell you that my book, Love & Successful Aging When You're 70+ and Single, is now on Amazon.com with the "search inside the book" feature.  This makes it easier to find out more about the contents.  Or, you can read the following excerpt from the Think You're Too Old For Love? article that was featured in Patch.com to get a handle on the flavor of the book.  Here's a condensation of the article, plus two questions at the end that should pique your interest.

      Who would have thought that in the 75th year of my up-and-down life I would meet a man who could finish my sentences?  And I his?  Who likes holding hands in the movies and hates eggplant as much as I do?  It's amazing to both of us!  The wonder of it all!  So let's hear it for random dining at one of the three restaurants in the retirement community in which we both live.

       I was surprised to find myself in this relationship after two marriages, the second of which lasted 30 years and from which I was widowed before moving to the retirement community.  But I found myself in a joyful place with finding a new companion with whom I would share my life.  (Note the word companion ... I had had enough husbands!)  That's when I began reaching out to other couples to see how they came together for love, joy and pleasure while leading independent, separate lives.

        And so I designed a survey that would give me the kind of information I was looking for and might prove useful to other older adults who were widowed, divorced or never married, but were hopeful about meeting someone with whom they could walk love's path.  I didn't ask any questions about sex or money -- I wouldn't respond to any survey that did -- but chose to focus on how and where they met, what attracted you to the other person, and most tellingly (I thought) were the last two questions:
         
       10.  "Have you considered marriage? (check all that apply)

• Yes, but not financially practical
• Yes, but creates too many unnecessary problems
• Never discussed it
• Happy with things the way they are

and
        11.  "What do your children think of your relationship? (please check one only)

• No children
• Approve of relationship
• Not thrilled with relationship but accepting of it
• Disapprove

      I would love to hear from readers which answers you think were checked most frequently by survey respondents.  

      Let's get a conversation going!!


Best regards,

Regina

Update on book

Hi All,

Here's a progress report on my book, Love & Successful Aging When You're 70+ and Single.

• It's in print FINALLY!
• It's an ebook and should be available on Kindle, Nook, iPad, and Reader in about two weeks!
• I'm studying how to get it on Amazon.com and should have that in place soon.
• I'm doing presentations and selling books to about 50% of attendees!

More good news to come.

Best regards,

Regina